Family Law – A Consumer Guide

Family law usually includes one or more of:

• divorce or civil partnership dissolution;
• financial settlements (property, money, pensions);
• child arrangements (where children live or spend time);
• domestic abuse protection (non-molestation or occupation orders);
• cohabitation disputes;
• pre-nuptial and post-nuptial agreements.

A good lawyer explains the process in plain English and gives a clear, realistic plan.

• Clear and honest advice about likely outcomes.
• Empathy without sugar-coating the truth.
• Written cost estimates and regular updates.
• Explaining court processes in a calm, understandable way.
• Keeping conflict as low as possible (especially when children are involved).
• Proper supervision of junior staff.

Before you instruct anyone, use:

• Questions to Ask a Lawyer
• Pre-instruction Checklist

Family law often produces the following service issues:

• slow or inconsistent communication;
• poor explanation of court processes or timescales;
• lack of preparation for hearings;
• missing or incomplete statements;
• costs rising faster than expected;
• overly aggressive or confrontational tactics that increase conflict unnecessarily;
• not being clear about realistic outcomes;
• poor supervision of trainees or paralegals.

If you notice repeated issues, start logging them in your Risk & Issue Log.

• They focus on creating conflict instead of resolving it.
• They give overly optimistic outcomes (“You’ll definitely get everything”).
• You are pushed towards unnecessary hearings or applications.
• They are slow to respond, even where court deadlines exist.
• They avoid giving advice in writing.
• They say “trust me” instead of explaining their reasoning.
• Your case is constantly passed between staff with no continuity.
• Bills arrive that do not match what was agreed.

If you see behaviour that might breach professional rules (honesty, integrity, best interests, confidentiality), see:

• Legal Services Act – Warning Signs
• Fake Apologies & Non-Answers

Useful questions include:

• “What are the realistic outcomes in this situation?”
• “What are the main risks I should be aware of?”
• “How long do you expect this process to take?”
• “How do you approach keeping conflict low?”
• “What information do you need from me right now?”
• “How will you communicate updates, and how often?”
• “How will costs be managed throughout the case?”

For the full list, see Questions to Ask a Lawyer.

Even though family law is emotional, structure helps you stay in control:

• Timeline Tracker – record hearings, deadlines, mediation dates, correspondence.
• Communication Log – document calls and emails, especially where you chase.
• Risk & Issue Log – each service issue becomes its own numbered entry.
• Cost Monitor – track real spending vs the initial estimate.

These tools prevent confusion and help you stay factual if you need to complain later.

If your case involves domestic abuse, your lawyer should:

• explain your options quickly and clearly (e.g., non-molestation or occupation orders);
• act urgently where needed;
• advise on police involvement and safeguarding;
• help gather evidence in a structured way.

Warning signs in abuse cases:

• the lawyer minimises your concerns;
• they are slow to act when urgency is needed;
• they push court unnecessarily instead of prioritising safety;
• they avoid explaining options in writing.

A lawyer handling children cases should:

• prioritise the safety and wellbeing of the children;
• give realistic advice about court expectations;
• explain what CAFCASS does;
• prepare you thoroughly for hearings and interviews;
• avoid inflaming conflict.

Red flags include:

• encouraging you to “fight for full custody” without explaining risks;
• telling you what you want to hear rather than the truth;
• poor preparation for hearings;
• no explanation of court orders or directions.

Concerning issues include:

• missed court deadlines;
• poor preparation of statements or evidence;
• unexpected huge increases in costs;
• failing to respond in urgent situations;
• biased or unprofessional behaviour;
• incorrect legal advice.

Your steps:

1. Ask for clarity and explanations in writing.
2. Record everything in your logs and timeline.
3. Make a structured, factual complaint to the firm.
4. If unresolved, escalate to the Ombudsman.

Helpful tools:

• Complaint Generator
• Ombudsman Complaint Builder
• Evidence Checklist
• How to Read a Solicitor’s Letter
• Fake Apologies & Non-Answers

This guide is published by to help consumers understand family law services, what good service looks like, and how to keep clear records if problems arise. It is general information, not legal advice.

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